First is the formatting. For something like this, a little back-story could be a great help.anonymous readerReport 2013-02-27 23:33:55Not bad but add some more detail«1» Yes, a bit more detail also helps the reader understand what’s going on. Free Porn 5 comments«1»anonymous readerReport 2013-03-10 20:05:14Are you all kidding me? 5 comments«1»anonymous readerReport 2013-03-10 20:05:14Are you all kidding me? Don’t be afraid of expounding more.zanonymous readerReport 2013-02-27 23:47:41So overall it has some good potential. Try separating the paragraphs out so that it is more readable. Also watch what types you put on top, you only had a gang rape of males/ female.anonymous readerReport 2013-02-28 00:38:25Break-up your paragraphs, watch your spelling and you capitalize CCUSA in one place and don’t in another (careful). Also watch what types you put on top, you only had a gang rape of males/ female.anonymous readerReport 2013-02-28 00:38:25Break-up your paragraphs, watch your spelling and you capitalize CCUSA in one place and don’t in another (careful).
