good base but needs work keep it up it gets easier trust me.«1» 2 comments«1»snapperboxReport 2012-08-14 01:25:33a paragraph would be nice and she should have sucked her father off in the beginninganonymous readerReport 2012-08-14 00:52:11you should format your story so it is easier to read. 2 comments«1»snapperboxReport 2012-08-14 01:25:33a paragraph would be nice and she should have sucked her father off in the beginninganonymous readerReport 2012-08-14 00:52:11you should format your story so it is easier to read. good base but needs work keep it up it gets easier trust me.«1» put a little more thought into the characters as to how they are feeling and sexual emotions. put a little more thought into the characters as to how they are feeling and sexual emotions. put a little more thought into the characters as to how they are feeling and sexual emotions. 2 comments«1»snapperboxReport 2012-08-14 01:25:33a paragraph would be nice and she should have sucked her father off in the beginninganonymous readerReport 2012-08-14 00:52:11you should format your story so it is easier to read.
